Uncertainty
by Dr Dana Stowe's Sidekick
Summary: Olivia faces her past, with a little help from Elliot. OE. Please R&R.
1. Default Chapter

**Chapter 1: Uncertainty**

**Olivia sat alone in the squad room sipping a cup of coffee. It wasn't long before Elliot joined her. **

**"Hey, Livia, what's up?" he asked as he sat down beside her.**

**She jumped a little. "You scared me, El. How long have you been there?"**

**"Not long, but you seem a little nervous. Is everything OK?"**

**"I was just thinking about my past."**

**"Really? Why?" His voice was gentle as he took both of her hands in his own.**

**"I just wonder if I'm gonna be able to hang on to all this for much longer."**

**"Hang on to what, Livia?"**

**"The pain and the anger. It's been eating away at me for years, and I've gotta make it stop. The problem is, I have no idea how."**

**Elliot nodded knowingly. "You're still mad at your parents, right?"**

**Olivia nodded, too. "But my mom died a couple years ago, and my dad, well, you know his story, so there's no way for me to tell them how I feel."**

**"I think I know a way."**

**"What is it?"**

**"Let's go visit your mom. You can vent all you want, and I'll even come with you." **

**"I couldn't ask you to do that, El. Besides, we've got a job to do."**

**"You're not asking, Livia, I'm offering, and Cragen will call one of us if another case comes in." **

**"I guess you're right, El."**

**He patted her shoulder. "That's the spirit. "Hey, Fin, could you tell Cap we're leaving for awhile?" he called toward the back of the precinct.**

**Fin, who was doing paperwork in a back office, gave him a thumbs-up.**

**"Thanks. Tell him to call us if he needs us."**

**Another thumbs-up.**

**"Let's go." His voice was calming as he led her out of the precinct. She had started shaking a few minutes before. "You wanna walk down?" **

**She nodded. "It's not far."**

**They walked to St. Joseph's Cemetery in silence. Olivia found Serena's headstone and stepped through the gates, Elliot in tow. **

**"Mom, it's Olivia. I know what you must be thinking. I'm not here to apologize, or to tell you how wrong I was to turn my back on you. I'm here to ask for the truth one last time. Did I mean anything to you at all, or was I just a weak little girl that you could use as a punching bag? You pretended I didn't exist when you weren't hurting me, and I was thankful for that. I was thankful when you weren't around and terrified when you were. That's why I moved out so young. I did it to get out of your grasp. Ya know, I tried to convince myself that I had to love you because you were my mom, but after awhile, I started thinking, "Hey, she's incapable of loving me, so why should I break my back trying to love her? She'll never see me as anything more than a reminder of her rape." You've caused me so much pain, and I'm sick of it. I'm letting you and that pain go now, Mom, for good." She took a deep breath before turning to face Elliot, who wrapped her in a comforting embrace. **

**"You did great, Livia. Do you feel like getting some coffee before we go back to the precinct?"**

**She smiled. "You read my mind, El," she said as they headed down to the corner coffee shop. **


	2. Truth

**A/N I'm sorry this has taken so long, but in all honesty, I sorta forgot about this story till I was rereading it earlier and got an idea.**

**Chapter 2: Truth**

**Warm sun streamed in on Elliot and Olivia as they drank their coffee. Suddenly, Olivia sighed wistfully and took another sip. Elliot noticed her change in mood right away."What's up, Livia?" he asked gently.**

**She inhaled slowly before she spoke. "I was just thinking I feel stronger now," she confessed. **

**Elliot nodded, smiling a little. "Well, you should. That took a lotta courage, and I could tell you'd been holding that pain in for a long time."**

**Olivia nodded. "I had. Thanks for helping me find a way to let it out."**

**Elliot smiled again. "I was happy to, Livia, and I'm there for you anytime you need me." **

**Olivia squeezed his arm gently. "Thanks, El. That means a lot to me," she told him, blushing slightly.  
He blushed, too. "Glad to help, Livia," he said gently.**

**Olivia was about to speak again when her cell phone rang. She groaned inwardly as she answered, "Benson."**

**"Liv? It's Catherine Willows."**

**"Cath? I haven't heard from you in ages. What's up?"**

**"There's something I need your help with. See, we're working a homicide where a 5-year-old is too shaken up to talk, and we thought you might be able to help us."**

**"I'll do whatever I can. Where is she?" **

**"She's staying with an aunt in your area. 312 South 76th Street, Upper East Side. Let me know if you can get her to talk, because we think she might've seen what happened to her mom."**

**Olivia clucked her tongue sympathetically. "Poor little thing," she said as Catherine sighed. "I'll help however I can, Cath, and I'll keep you posted."**

**"Thanks, Liv," Catherine told her as they hung up.**

**"What's up?" Elliot asked.**

**"That was Catherine Willows from the Las Vegas Crime Lab. We were in college at NYU together before I went into the police academy and she went to Las Vegas. Anyway, she called me because she needs our help with the 5-year-old daughter of a homicide victim. She's too shaken up to talk to them, so she thought we could help. Actually, she wanted me to talk to her, but since we're partners, I figure she meant we could each try. She said she was staying with an aunt at 312 South 76th Street, Upper East Side."**

**Elliot nodded. "Do you wanna go now?" he inquired.  
"The sooner, the better," Olivia answered as she rose.**

**"That's just what I was thinking," Elliot agreed.**

**With that, they headed toward the parking lot and hailed a cab.  
Ten minutes later, they reached the house and got out. Olivia preceded Elliot as they reached the stoop. She rapped her knuckles on the door gently.  
"Mrs. Anzo?" she asked. "Are you home? It's the police."**

**A few minutes later. A petite brown-haired woman answered the door. "Has something else happened?" she inquired.**

Olivia shook her head. "No, it's not that," she said reassuringly as they flashed their badges "I'm Detective Benson, and this is my partner, Detective Stabler." She stepped inside, closely followed by Elliot. "We're here because of what happened to your sister. We got a call from a CSI from the Las Vegas Division. She thinks your niece may have seen what happened, but that she was too shaken up to talk to them, so she thought we could help. Can we see her?"

**Mrs. Anzo nodded. "She's upstairs in her room. It's the second door on the right,"  
**

**Suddenly, Olivia turned to Elliot. "Should we go up together?" she asked quietly.**

**"Sure," he replied as he followed her upstairs.  
**

**When they reached the little girl's room, Olivia knocked gently. "Honey, we're here about your mommy. Can we come in?" she inquired. **

**"Are you the police?" came a voice from inside/**

**Olivia smiled at Elliot. At least it was a start. "That's right, Honey," she told her as they flashed their badges from the other side of the keyhole. "We are. Can we come in?" she asked again.**

**"Yeah." The girl's voice was quiet as she came to the door and let them in/**

**"Hi, my name's Olivia, and this is my friend, Elliot. What's your name?"**

"**Sienna," she replied as her eyes darted to Elliot.  
"That's a pretty name. Listen, would you feel better if it was just you and me?" she questioned as she sat down on her bed.**

**Sienna nodded, and Elliot left immediately.**

**Once the door had shut behind him. Sienna curled up in Olivia's lap. "You wanna know what happened to Mommy, don't you, Olivia?" she asked, and Olivia nodded, holding her closer as she wondered if the little girl would disclose her secrets.**


	3. Revelations

**Chapter 3: Revelations **

**Sienna snuggled closer to Olivia, but she didn't speak. Olivia's voice was gentle as she said, "Honey, I can help you, but I need to know everything. Did you get a good look at the person who hurt your mama?"\**

**Sienna nodded.**

**"Can you describe the person for me?"**

**"He was young, white, tall, and had mean blue eyes."**

**"Did you notice the color of his hair?"**

**"Blond."**

**"Did he hurt you, too?"**

**"He touched me between my legs to keep me quiet. He said he'd hurt me worse if I told anyone. You won't let him hurt me, will you, Olivia?" Her eyes were pleading.**

**Olivia cuddled her tighter. "He won't hurt you anymore, Honey, I promise. I'll protect you. Can you tell me how he hurt your mama?" **

**"I was sleeping, and a loud, scary thud woke me up. I went to the top of the stairs, and I saw the man shoving my mommy around. Then, I saw a gun and heard a big bang. I curled up in a corner because I was scared, and that's when he came up and touched me."**

**Olivia sighed sympathetically. "I'm sorry foe what happened to you and your mama, Honey. I know this is gonna be hard, but I need to ask you a favor."**

**"What?" Sienna asked, looking up. **

**"Do you think you could pick the man out of a group for me?"**

**"I'm scared to, Olivia." **

**"I know you are, Honey, but I'll be right in the room with you."**

**"What if he sees me?"**

**"You can see the men, but they can't see you behind the special glass we have."**

**"So, he can't get me?"**

**Olivia shook her head. "No, you'll be safe."**

**"Ok. When?"**

**"Tomorrow." **

**"Livia, don't go yet. I don't wanna be alone."**

**"You won't be. Your aunt's downstairs." **

**"Can you cuddle me a little more?" **

**Olivia merely nodded, and the silence wrapped around them like a blanket.**


	4. The Big Day

**Chapter 4: The Big Day**

**The next morning around 9:00, Sienna walked into the squad room with her aunt. She ran straight for Olivia, who picked her up, **

**"You ready?" she asked gently.**

**Sienna nodded. "Let's go."**

**Olivia took her into the lineup room and lifted her onto the sill. Casey had joined them. "If you recognize the man, just point him out and tell us the number he's holding. Take your time. There's no hurry."**

**Sienna took a long look and turned to Olivia. "It was number 2. I'm sure that's him."**

**Olivia patted her shoulder as she lifted her down. "You did great. Come on, I'll get you back to your aunt." She smiled. This was a good start. She decided to call and give Cat the good news. **


End file.
